Beagle Mafia

4! I am just getting over the shock, well I dont think I am really over the shock just yet but each day I get a little more use to the idea. This would explain my brief absence here.

The Boy was not planned at all and I got pregnant with him on birth control. We were young and so not ready but we made it through. Then we tried for 5 years after he was born and we unable to get pregnant. Last year, we decided that it would be too big of an age gap and we could smell the sense of freedom in 9 years when he turned 18. Occasionally, I would get the baby itch, but I would scratch it and move on. I made a decision to go back to school and earn a degree so that I could start a career. I was really looking forward to entering the work force again and finally doing something for myself more than anything. For the past 8 years, I have been a stay at home mom and I would not change it for a single second. However, there comes a point in your life when you get a little selfish and want more of a title for yourself other than a SAHM. :) Marking down "homemaker" in the occupation box gets a little old. I have since graduated to "student" but I was hoping next year I could mark "medical biller and coder." I even decided to go back to school full time vs part time literally the day before I found out this surprise.

I started having sciatic pain which I havent had since giving birth to The Boy. I then realized that I was a couple days late and even tried to justifiy that I must of wrote it down wrong. So the next morning, I found the one test I had tucked away. I was not expecting the result of "pregnant". It was surreal, something I wanted for such a long time and here it is NOW. NOW, when its not the best time, NOW when things in my every area of my life are beyond chaotic, NOW that I became a full time student, NOW that I traded in my suv for a sports car, NOW that I could feel the sense of freedom, NOW? Really? This is happening NOW?

I pretty much let the cat out of the bag immediately because after all this was not planned. I didnt feel like hiding it from friends and family. It would have become quite apparent. I did have it confirmed with my doctor so now begins the 2 week wait for for the first sonogram.

I have tried to figure out what was so different now than the past 5 years when we were unsuccessful. The only thing that has changed is that both Capo and I have lost a considerable amount of weight. That is really the only significant change that could have landed us in this position.

In the end, we are excited still a little shocked and learning to accept each day that this is happening and our life plans need to be altered but regardless, this is a blessing.

A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bank balance smaller, home happier, clothes dirty, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.